We all have something

My former teammate and Olympian, Suzie Paxton and I had a long conversation the other night. We talked about how things are going for me and my pursuit of Beijing. I told her the truth, things were a little rocky from time to time. It's sometimes hard for me to see the result at the end of the road when I work and struggle through each day and each tournament.

I told her some of my perceived weaknesses and she admitted to some of her own while she was training for the 1996 games. Then we got on the subject of athletes we admired and she mentioned someone that had a physical disability but was still playing high level sports with a prosthetic leg. He has actually done more incredible things after the accident than before-almost as if having a prosthetic leg gives him a reason to be the best.

People who encounter these types of obstacles in their lives either go one of two ways. One, the route of feeling sorry for themselves. Or two, making each day count because they are very aware of how life can throw some crazy curve balls. Suzie then said something to me that resonated, "everyone has a disability but some are not as visible as a prosthetic leg".

That got me thinking about my unseen disabilities. Perhaps my greatest disability is ego. Things used to be so much easier for me and I could win almost any tournament I entered but now the end result isn't as certain. After Richmond, there was a part of me that went down the road of self-pity. I will admit that it took a good week for me to get out of a depressed funk. Maybe it's okay to have a moment (or a week in my case) to admit defeat and nurse the wound?

On Monday of this week, my sports psychologist asked me if I wanted to quit. For a moment, I considered it very seriously. I could walk away, but if I walk away from this I will have given in to all the fear and doubt. Who's to say that I won't be faced with a hard situation again? This is life after all, a series of challenges. When the going gets tough does Iris get going?

If anything, I would want to know that I am the type of person that would not choose the easy way out. After all, I didn't sign up to train for a regional tournament, I signed up for the Olympics. Here is where acceptance comes in and gives way to persistence. Just like the man with a prosthetic leg, I can allow my ego to disable me or I can use it to help me achieve extraordinary things.

The fortune is in the cookie

I hope everyone had a great weekend!

Just a short story to start off the week.

My mother is a translator for a company here in Rochester that provides translation services for hospitals and clinics. One of her clients is an older Chinese gentleman that always insists on inviting my family to dinner. Well, Sunday night was the night that we finally agreed and all of us hauled over to the Super Duper China Buffet. I'm not one for buffets but it seemed like all of Rochester was there.

After our meal we received the bill and of course, a few fortune cookies for the table. Now, I never really care for the fortunes and usually laugh at the mistranslation of the Chinese words on the back of the fortune, but this time I had a reason to pay attention.

I have been feeling a little down lately about fencing and my journey to the Olympics, and the words, "Why am I doing this?", have been playing over and over again in my head.

It was as if Confucius heard about my struggle and plopped the appropriate fortune in front of me that read, "Never give up". Short, sweet, and definitely to the point.

I'm not one to follow these fortune cookie superstitions but if it's good enough for the guy who writes these fortunes in the New York Chinatown factory, then it's good enough for me.

The fortune is in the cookie-NEVER GIVE UP!

Side note:

Origins of the fortune cookie (as per Wikipedia)

San Francisco and Los Angeles both lay claim to the origin of the fortune cookie. Makoto Hagiwara of Golden Gate Park's Japanese Tea Garden in San Francisco is said to have invented the cookie in 1909, while David Jung, founder of the Hong Kong Noodle Company in Los Angeles, is said to have invented them in 1918.

San Francisco's Court of Historical Review ruled in 1983 in favor of San Francisco. Although the court was presided over by a Federal judge, the court itself has been criticized as being less than serious and biased in favor of San Francisco. Its conclusions, therefore, might not be the final word on the subject.

P.S. The fortune cookie will not be served to you with your bill when eating in Beijing, Shanghai, or anywhere in China for that matter.